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If You Had A Crystal Ball

The future is fickle and unclear, as is the fate of any of our relationships. Take a trip with Sarah Sol as she uncovers the anxieties which manifest in the face of the unknown when it comes to love.


Have you ever looked at your significant other and thought, “Damn, I really hope you’re not an axe murderer?”


I have.


Some facts:


• Intimate partner homicide is the most common form of homicide in Australia. [1]

• In 2021 there were 55,244 divorces granted in Australia. [2]

• 52.9 per cent of single mothers are millennials. [3]

• 36 per cent of Gen X (aged 42-57) are divorced. [4]


My parents fall into this category. What does that mean for me?


My mother married the wrong man. Her scars still run through our family’s veins, and I’m afraid the same will happen to me.


I’m not going to pretend my relationship is perfect, but… it is. He treats me right, he buys me bouquets of daf fodils, he texts me when he’s busy and shows me all five love languages, but he’s clumsy too. Our relationship is clumsy. We get mad, we bicker, we argue, we have different political views. I’m all “save the earth” and he’s all “work the people.” But my boyfriend and my relationship are perfect. Isn’t it?


What if this handsome, beautiful, caring man is actually an axe murderer, and he’s just really good at lying?


What if this is a situation like Joe and Beck from Netflix’s You? My boyfriend has done nothing to suggest he is in any way disloyal or untrustworthy, but what if I marry the wrong man, just like my mother? Even the tarot cards don’t have answers to my questions…but what about a crystal ball?


What if you had a crystal ball that could tell you the truth about any ONE thing, what would you want to know?


Would you ask how long you live for, and live in constant fear of that date? Or would you ask how you die and be satisfied with the answer? Would you ask about your greatest flaws and weaknesses, so you could improve yourself? Would you ask if you were on the right path, or what degree you should really be studying? Will you be married? If so, will it be with the person you are with now? Will you divorce or stay single forever? Would you ask if aliens really do exist? If monkeys will wage a war against humanity like in Rise of the Planet of the Apes?


I would ask if I was going to marry the right person


Because, even though the man who stands before me is perfect in every way, my messed up soul is always afraid he isn’t. Maybe it will be another case like Shanteari Weems5 , or maybe it will be a fairy tale like Rapunzel.


If I had a crystal ball, I would ask it questions of the future, and I’d hope it had precise answers, not twisted signs and angel numbers, something with more detail than what tarot cards and clear crystals can offer.


But I don’t have a crystal ball. So, I must trust my gut, my intuition. I have to trust the symbolism behind the pictures on the tarot cards, the numbers on my clock, the odd repetitive coincidence of lost dogs.


But if you had a crystal ball, could you handle its truth?


Imagine your partner called you ugly, said you looked funny with your glasses on. Well they were being honest, weren’t they? Would you be happy that they were truthful, or hurt by their words? Imagine if your brother told you he hated you. What if your uncle called you dumb and told you to give up on your dreams because you would never make it? What if your father told you his biggest mistake was having you as a child? What if your teachers told you to drop out of university because you were useless and doomed to fail?


What if this all-knowing crystal ball gleamed a lapis blue and told you that your family and friends would abandon you, that you were the unfortunate sibling, that you would die alone, unremembered by a dying planet? What if it told you of gruesome war, of torture or death? What would you do with the truth?


If you had a crystal ball, would you be happy with the truth it gave you? Or would you shatter it to pieces, throw it off a building, roll it down a mountain and choose to live with false hope and unachievable dreams?


What would your question be if you had a crystal ball? Could you handle the truth?


Or would you ask your crystal ball nothing at all?

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